How much do you value yourself?
It’s a difficult question to answer, so let me ask you these questions instead…
Do you feel you’re being treated as well as you could be?
Is your life all that it could be?
Are you being taken-for-granted?
If you’re feeling like you’re not being treated as well as you could be, perhaps your sense of self-worth is at the heart of the issue.
We teach other people how to treat us. It shows in the way we speak about ourselves and in how we approach or hesitate in the face of opportunity. We teach them our value every time we accept their comments or their behaviour. People will accept your value at the level we create.
If you’re not being valued, that won’t change until you change your self-worth. Repeatedly in my work as coach, I’ve found this situation. I’ve worked with some exceptionally talented people who have no idea of their true value. This is especially true of women. They wait for someone else to tell them how important they are.
The only person who can change the message you are giving out is you.
So how do you learn to understand your true value? It’s going to take some courage, but you can do it.
1. First you need to take a good look at yourself.
Dig deep inside and find what you’re really good at.
You have talents – so bring them to light. And yes, I know this is difficult, but you don’t have to justify anything to yourself. Get over your reluctance to acknowledge what’s great about you. There’s nothing shameful about showing and using the skills and talents you’ve been given. That’s what you’re here for.
2. Next, because I know you’ll probably feeling uncomfortable with that first step, is to seek feedback from your friends, leaders and mentors.
They will all have something to say about what makes you so good at what you do. They’re also in a position to give you feedback about areas which might need some work. We all have them. But here’s an important note… DON’T focus on your weaknesses. Focus on your strengths. You need a balanced view of yourself to know your real value.
3. Stop comparing yourself with others.
You have different gifts and different stories. You are an individual and that is what is important. It’s what makes you unique.
When you compare yourself, you become jealous of the other person’s successes and envious of their progress. When you stop comparing, you can share in the celebration of their successes.
Imagine how that change will alter the way you see yourself and how others see you?
4. Finally, and here’s a biggie. Stop accepting anything less than you deserve, whether it’s attitudes, the way you’re spoken to or the way you are treated.
As I said, if you accept less than you’re worth, that’s the level of value you set on yourself, and that’s what you’re communicating to others. Yes, they will be shocked at first, if they are used to treating you with disregard, but they will soon pay attention and change their behaviour.
You are better than you know.
One of the most enjoyable parts of my work as coach and mentor is watching my clients realise exactly how good they are. They are stronger and bolder than they realise. They are braver and more strategic than they realise. And, once they decide to change, they are unstoppable. It will be the same for you. Imagine how that will change your life?
I know taking that first step is a challenge, but I’m here to help you do it. Just call me or shoot me an email and we’ll get started. Take that first step and start showcasing your true worth.