Speaking Confidently to Yourself – Your Self-Talk Matters

Whether you realise it or not, we are all constantly conducting an inner dialogue within ourselves. This self-talk affects our confidence and self-esteem and can either boost or hinder our ability to achieve success.

Practising positive self-talk on a regular basis improves our ability to regulate our emotions and helps us recognise our true value. When we take our self-talk “public” and speak to ourselves out loud, it strengthens our resolve and improves learning and memory, making it easier to recall information later.

That’s why it is important we actively work to become aware of our inner thoughts and emphasise our positive attributes in our self-talk. What we say to ourselves matters!

Use the following tips to harness the power of your mind, calm those feelings of doubt and improve your outlook on yourself, and your abilities.

1. Recognise negative thoughts and overrule them

While most of our self-talk occurs “below the radar” it’s important to hear what we are saying to ourselves sub-consciously. Many times, our self-talk takes on a negative tone because it isn’t our own voice at all. If we listen carefully we discover the “voice” of our worries belongs to a parent, teacher, or authority figure from our past.

Nothing good comes from allowing these destructive voices to populate our minds. When you sense one of these thoughts coming into your mind, look at it for what it is; a remnant of your past that has nothing to do with who you are today.

Let it go and replace these negative thoughts with positive ones. Remind yourself of the things that you are good at and the great things that you’ve already done. Remind yourself of your virtues and achievements banish those damaging thoughts from your mind.

2. Be gentle with yourself

Did you forget to do something important, or make some other mistake? Don’t allow your flaws to overwhelm your thoughts. We’re all human and prone to error so be kind to yourself!

Just as you would comfort a close friend when they experience a setback, be compassionate with yourself when you make a mistake.

While there are times when you’ll make errors in judgement, you can also learn from your mistakes and use this information to improve your future performance.

Learn what you can, but then leave your mistake firmly in the past.

3. Focus on your future

Our thoughts have a habit of focusing attention on the obstacles that stand in the way of what we want to accomplish. Unfortunately, this can drain our energy and leave us feeling demoralised and unable to move forward.

Rather than focusing on the obstacle, think about smaller steps you can take to go around it and still move forward. Shift your attention towards your goal.

Focusing on your vision and what things will be like once you achieve it, boosts your resilience and gives you the energy you need to go forward, defeating the obstacles holding you back.

What is the current state of your self-talk?

Can you honestly say things like, “I believe in myself, I trust myself and my judgment, I’ve followed my heart and I feel good about myself,” or do you still find yourself paralysed by thoughts of fear or doubt? Does your self-talk stop you from moving ahead with confidence?

Increasing your positive self-talk will give you the power to recognise embrace your true talents, increase your performance and advance your career and life.

Knowing your strengths and having clarity helps you recognise this harsh inner critic for what it is and feel better about yourself and your abilities. If you need help to find your strengths and achieve clarity for your career, take a look at my NEW Career Clarity Online Coaching Program. It will ensure you ditch self-doubt for good!